The Acceptance of Victory

Just as defeat, victory too must be accepted with grace.

Reality Quote

"Reality is a metaphor."

Getting What You Want

If you are not getting something that you "want", the reason why you're not getting it could be a strange truth: you don't actually want it.

It seems a bit difficult to understand, but recent observation reveals to me that in many situations, men stop "wanting" something when they realise that it is difficult to get. They may crib about it, but the truth is that they don't want it.

The simple solution, whenever you find yourself not getting what you want, is to clearly say to yourself, "I want (to) _______ ". Mean it.

Trust me: if you do this, more often than not, you get what you want. Or you may realise that you don't want that thing. In any case, you'll be at peace.

Another Original Quote

Truth is great fiction

When To Say 'Thank You'

One should only thank someone when that person expects to be thanked. But in many cases, one can only guess what the person expects and in these situations, the following rule will do a lot of good:

I would suggest that the words 'thank you' should only be used when you want to express your gratitude to someone for either going out of the way to help you or helping you on your request or helping you when you did not expect it.

In all other cases, 'thank you' has a counter-productive effect.

The Importance of Being Frank

We've all been in situations where we try to be too nice and pretend to agree with someone when actually we don't.

Some believe that such behaviour is self-demeaning and is therefore wrong. Others defend it by saying that within its limits, such behaviour is an occasional compromise for the sake of better cooperation.

I strongly believe that it is wrong to do so - and it has nothing to do with self-respect.

When we pretend to agree with someone, the person whom we are dealing with generally ends up believing that we actually share his opinion. So he behaves with us accordingly, only to realise on a later day that we don't actually agree with him.

The result of this long story is that, while trying to be nice, we actually cheat the person whom we were dealing with. The intention of trying to be nice doesn't justify it : cheating is cheating.

A General Theory of How We Think and Act

"Watch your thoughts. They become words. Watch your words. They become deeds. Watch your deeds. They become habits. Watch your habits. They become character. Character is everything."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In one of my latest posts, I talked about how a change in thinking does not directly change concrete situations. Today, I want to draw my readers' attention towards a larger picture, a picture which explains the relation between action, thinking, perception and consciousness. It seems to me that these four things are connected with each other in a feedback loop.

I am leaving "habits" and "character" out of the discussion, because they are mere niceties which can be explained on the basis of what I'm about to say.*

Some preliminary explanations:

By actions, I mean physical processes which we execute, voluntarily or involuntarily and consciously or subconsciously.

By thinking, I mean the mental processes by which we analyse what we perceive, form opinions, make decisions, etc. These too can be voluntary or involuntary and conscious or subconscious.

By perception, I mean the mental process by which our minds receive information from the various senses. This information is often filtered. Further, information from the various senses is integrated to form one percept. To put it very simply, perception means how we see things.

By consciousness, I mean the way in which our mind is "plugged in" or the state of our mind. The might mind be "plugged in" in any way, but if it is not plugged in, nothing whatsoever would work. (I am not using this the word "consciousness" in the sense of "conscious and unconscious". To me, as long as a person is alive, he has a consciousness, because his mind is "plugged in" in some way or another.)

When I say "subconscious process", I mean a process that we are not consciously aware of. Even a "subconscious process" can only occur if there is consciousness, i.e, the mind is "plugged in".

Now, Emerson begins by telling us to watch our thoughts. However, our thoughts don't come from nowhere. The data which they analyse in order to form opinions (becoming words, in Emerson's terms) and make decisions (becoming deeds, if carried forward to the action stage) comes from perception. If we perceived differently, we would think differently.

This is where a problem arises: how can one change his own process of perception ? If one cannot see something, or one can see it only in a particular way, how can one change that ? Learning to see things can only help in specific cases. For example, if I can't see a tiger hidden behind a bush, I might see it when someone points it out to me. But that might not allow me to see another tiger hidden behind another bush ! Perhaps, after being shown several tigers behind several bushes, I might even learn how to spot tigers behind bushes. But that would not affect my inability to spot, say, a particular rythme in a Wallace Stevens poem. So basically, perception cannot be taught.

Further, the process of perception is value neutral because it is completely or atleast substantially subconscious. Thus, there is no "correct" way to perceive. Yet, perception leads to thought which leads to action. And there is definitely a "correct" way to act, atleast for the sake of achieving a particular object.

Then I realised that there is a way to change how we perceive. There is one and only one way: a change in consciousness. If the way in which one's mind is "plugged in" is changed, he would perceive very differently. For example, think about how any drug, be it coffee, tea, tobacco, alcohol, or LSD (and God knows what else) changes the state of our mind. Alcohol typically puts us in a state of mind in which we underestimate risks. Coffee and tea, it seems to me, make us more attentive and thereby, we perceive several finer points which otherwise evade us. Though I can't speak for LSD, Aldous Huxley, in The Doors of Perception, has superbly demonstrated how everything seems so different on mescaline.

So, how does one effect a change in consciousness ? Obviously, taking drugs is one way. Meditation, I am told, does the same thing in a healthier way. Perhaps exposing oneself to some strong sensation might do the same thing. (Exposure to bright light, excrutiating pain, etc.) What is common to all these things is that they are actions which change our environment, internal or external. I strongly believe, therefore, that actions which change our environment, internal or external, can bring about a change in our consciousness.

Actually, even a change in our environment which is independent of our actions, can change our consciousness. But I am more concerned with voluntary changes.

So we have the following loop:

The loop moves only in one direction. This is model is slightly incomplete, because I've not properly dealt with how thought and actions can be laterally affected by other thoughts and actions. The same applies to consciousness and perception, though I have briefly talked about how perception can be modified laterally.

The moral of this story, like the moral of that earlier post, is this: The easiest way to change yourself is by doing something, not "thinking differently."

I personally believe that certain types of consciousness are preferable. In other words, one can compare and objectively evaluate states of mind. For example, a state of mind which is energetic would obviously be preferable to a mind which is always exhausted. And there are specific things that one can do to have a desirable type of consciousness which is sustainable. Tobacco might make somebody feel like working, but it has its flipside. That is hardly the case with Yoga.

Sometime later, I'll add a list of such actions to this post. Phew !

*I think that "character" is akin to what I call "consciousness" in this post. Habit, however, is a more complicated thing.

"Why" is not important

A typical question that many of us face in an interview is "why ?". "Why do you want to do this ?" , "Why did you choose this profession ?", "Why do you like this subject ?", "Why do you want to be (x) ? " ; etc.

The answers are not always very easy to find.

But look at it this way: think of some of man's greatest feats: the ascent of Everest, man's journey to the moon, Michaelangelo's sculpture, Shakespeare's tragedies.. can any of these people answer why they did it ? I doubt it.

Such questions don't make much sense. One must answer them accordingly.

Self-esteem (Definition)

Self-esteem, in a social setting, means our estimate of what others think of us.

I will talk about whether or not self-esteem is important in a later post.

A very small observation

Exact opposites are one and the same thing.
One must understand this.

The Minds of "Great Men"

Some personalities, such as politicians, statesmen, certain intellectuals, bureaucrats, diplomats and perhaps businessmen must possess the following mental abilities to function well.

They should have two distinct modes: on and off. When they are on, their mind is working superbly, taking in a lot of data, making sense of it consciously and sub-consciously and generating good output according to the requirements of the situation. In some cases, this means that they are making good split second decisions, whereas in some cases (such as intellectuals) it means that they are just processing a lot of data really fast, making sense of it and re-presenting it or synthesising it. This basically means that their mind works, to use an analogy i would not prefer but would give a good idea of what i mean, like a brilliant supercomputer.

Obviously, experience helps this computer. With time, several ideas and concepts will have firmly settled in their mind so that they can be taken as given without having to delve deeply into them. This further speedens up the process. It must be noted, however, that even these ideas must be re-evaluated from time to time, a topic which we will not deal with now.

The off mode is a mode in which they totally detach themselves from their job at hand and allow their mind to totally relax. This mode is as important as the on mode, as this is literally the only time when the mind gets to relax. This mode includes periods of sleep and other times of relaxation such as some time taken for a jog, etc.

This mode is very important! It is very often at this time, when the mind is not actively working on an issue, that all that info is sent for detailed archiving and reprocessing to the subconscious sectors of the mind. This process, by making the data and ideas more consistent, increases the clarity, clears the proverbial fog and thus facilitates better, clearer and original thinking based on the material already evaluated. Further, doing other activities stimulates different areas of the nervous system, which can influence the original ideas by rubbing off a different angle onto them. This means that it increases creativity. It is no wonder that, true or untrue, Aristotle got a great idea while having a bath while Newton got some idea while sulking near an apple tree. Similarly, another great scientist got some amazing ideas on chemical bonds while dreaming of snakes..

In the off mode, one must totally dedicate one's attention to staying off and doing whatever else one is doing... it must be strictly off!

Why I highlighted certain personalities at the start is that I think that these people spend extraordinarily large amounts of time in the "on" mode. This is a testament to their energy, stamina and mental fitness. One has to admit that our politicians, however crooked, are extremely fit mentally and very hard working. Some of them, especially people such as the PM, the President, etc, are "always on".

Believe me, you won't get anywhere without this!

True Friendship Quote (Original)

A very good test of friendship is how easily a friend can say no to another without any one feeling uncomfortable.

About: Anger

Anger is always a sign of frustration or desperation. Once you realise this, it could be easier for you to control yourself when you're angry. It (anger) can rarely achieve anything useful.

Also keep this in mind when dealing with an angry person.

Further, anger arises very easily in a person who is hungry or tired.

More Good Quotes

This one's from Marcel Proust, sometimes referred to as the greatest novelist of the 20th century:

Let us leave pretty women to men devoid of imagination.

And this one is straight from a Bombay based jeweler, who was talking about real diamonds:

Only a diamond can polish another diamond.

A Curious Experiment With Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

- Robert Frost

Let's try this on the internet ! Let's take the obscure links and see where we reach! Less Google, less Digg and less StumbleUpon.

As for the complete poem, you can find it here.

The Mark of an Experienced Man

An experienced man (or woman) is a person who can predict the behaviour of a system which is otherwise unpredictable, simply because of the amount of experience that he has with the system.

The person might not actually make predictions (as these can themselves alter behaviour), but will act upon certain internal assumptions that he makes about how the system will behave in the future.

I do not mean to say, however, that this enables the man to make better decisions. He is just better informed. Decision making is a different ball game...

Ode to Passion

Very often, we skip doing the things that we live for because we can't find the time and space for them.

- It was too late.

- I was dead tired.

- I had an exam.

- I had a important meeting.

These are the only times that make a difference. If I do something everyday, but when it becomes hard for me to do it, I let go, it's no big deal.

That's the difference between a passion and all else - For a passion, it only matters then... everything else is forgiven.

If you don't have a passion, ignore this post.

Classification v. Continuity

I know that this suggestion is very difficult to implement, but try it:

When thinking of things and analysing them, try not to classify them into categories. Put them on a scale.

For example: Norway is a cold country and Singapore is a warm country.

This classification seems perfectly justified, but it leads to a liking for oversimplification, where we continuously put things and people into categories just for the analytical pleasure of it. Try forming a description of any person you know and you'll get what I mean.

What should be done is to just keep things on a scale and analyse things comparatively.

For Example : Norway is colder than Singapore.

Such a method of analysis keeps the analysis more realistic.

Is This The End?

Hello Everybody,

Regular visitors to this blog must have noticed that in the past few months, the already irregular flow of posts has trickled down to nothing. There have been instances in the past when this happenned but I am inclined to think that those instances were only seasonal variations in the flow of my observations....

An unfortunate series of events has, I am afraid, blocked the free flow of my observations in a manner which makes me think that the cause of this scarcity of good thought is more structural than seasonal this time.

I am noting this down on my blog because I think that the explicit definition of the problem might lead the way towards a possible solution. I believe the problem has a lot to do with a loss of both the environment conducive to my thinking as well as the methodology which refines the original observations.

In brief, I've lost material!! A writer's block perhaps.

All help will be entertained. Your suggestions will do a lot.

Please Help!

Yours Idiotically,
Talented Idiot.

Good idea

This one's from a good friend:

Amitabh Bachchan, in one of his movies, is drunk when points to a bottle of whiskey and says, "If this thing had spirit in it, it would behave drunk." (that's the best translation i could manage).

What it means is that the alchohol itself does not make us behave strangely, but it only releases something that is already there within us. Think about it.....